Personality type vs Behaviour

little girl
Confident little girl

Many of my clients exhibit behavioural problems and somehow believe that their behaviour is linked to their personality type.

Firstly your personality is not fixed – it is pliable.  Secondly – change your behaviour consistently and you have effectively changed your personality.


Your Personality determines how you are likely to behave – however your behaviour is still a choice.  People typically determine their own personality using something like  a Myers Briggs test or a more modern system.   Note that your personality also likely changes with age.

Example 1 – Introverts Vs Extroverts in a discussion about Public Speaking.

Yes it is true that an extrovert may take to the stage and be completely natural.  It is also true that an Introvert may be more shy.

However it is also perfectly possible for a shy introvert to become a very capable public speaker.   The end result when they become good is that nobody would really know whether they are introvert or extrovert – and in a professional presentation there may be no way of telling the difference between the two distinct personality types.

Example 2 – Anxiety

Some people are more predisposed towards anxiety yet it really matters how they behave that determines the outcome.   Often someone who is anxious behaves in a way that perpetuates their anxiety.   This is something that Hypnotherapy and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy seeks to address.   An anxious person will very often use self limiting language to describe themselves.  They will describe themselves as someone “Suffering from anxiety”   (Hmmm – I’m not sure as seeing yourself as a victim of a physical symptom of stress is a good strategy for dealing with anxiety).   They will often use catastrophic language  – for example – “I’m having a nightmare of a day” – they have basically written off a whole day and created a self fulfilling prophesy.  They in effect have foreseen a day full of stress.

What you think about you tend to manifest.  If you see yourself as unlucky , then you will tend to have less luck.   If you see yourself as unattractive then you will attract fewer people.   Be very careful what your own inner narrative is saying since it can determine the outcome.


There are some behaviours that can be separated away from personality – one does not guarantee the other.   Hypnotherapy is very useful at helping you adjust your behaviour.

Anxiety, Stress, Anger, habits, addiction, compulsion, obsession, phobia, PTSD, Confidence, Motivation.

Negative impact of events

A negative reference experience can colour our judgement of the present.  Kids are often naturally confident yet this may not follow them into adulthood if something happens to shake this confidence.   Hypnotherapy will often use regression to examine negative references from a different angle.

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